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Dealing with hard well water

I am presently in the process of gathering the pieces for two 125 gallon
tanks which I am building into my living room wall.   Both tanks will be
heavily planted, so I am paying much more attention to lighting, CO2, etc.
than I have with previous tanks.  It's all coming together, except...

I can't seem to find a consensus on what I should do about my water.  My
water comes from a well and is very hard and quite alkaline.  I have
considered putting in a water softener, but the water softener people tell
me that the output contains "Sodium"  (I'm guessing this means salt, as
salt is used to regen the softener) but cannot tell me how much or whether
it is enough to affect plants and fish.

I have looked at RO units, but I have been told that the salt from the
softener would quickly plug up the membrane in an RO unit.

I am sure this problem is being dealt with by some of you.  What does one
do with hard, alkaline water to make it suitable for a planted aquarium?

The very act of seeking sets something in motion to meet us;
something in the universe, or in the unconscious responds as if
to an invitation.  - Jean Shinoda Bolen