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Of CO2 and suicide : )

Dave and Co.,
    In our living room labs, we have discovered an inexpensive way to
keep your fish from committing 'Carbon Dioxide Suicide.'  Simply allow
the air above the water in the aquarium to constantly and slowly be
replaced by fresh air.  This will keep the CO2 levels at saturation or
below and even provide a source of oxygen to replace depleted O2 at
night.  Simply fax a $100 bill to the phone number below, drill some
holes or cut an opening in your hood, place a cheap $10 computer fan
(that runs off of 120 volts) in the hole and voila!

    Beware, there may be an underlying cause for your fish to want to
consider suicide, so you should have them evaluated by a professional
psychiatrist (see yellow pages.)

    Remember, laughter is the best medicine, unless you have fishie TB!
Hope you have a good day!  : )

Doug Bertelsen
dbert at umr_edu